Yesterday my boy had an emotional breakdown. The kind that he thought he could not get out of, everything was against him in the world, no one loved him, everything was his fault, ‘why don’t you love me was his words to me’ 😩

It absolutely breaks my heart seeing him try to process these thoughts and emotions. It shows up as tension in his little body, tears streaming down his face, whole body shaking, raging anger, debilitating fear. It gets to the point where he sits in the corner, hits himself in the head and yells and screams at whoever is around

In these moments I know there is no reasoning with him. There is no trying get get conversation out of him, I can only be near him, tell him I love him and patiently wait u til he is ready to see me

He storms out, goes upstairs and lays on the lounge in a fetal position, I follow, with distance and I just sit. Now by this time guests were arriving at my house for the birthday party, I hadn’t finished putting the cake together, I left the broom in the hallway, I was still in my daggy pj’s, no bra 🤦🏽‍♀️, mop of hair BUT in that moment I didn’t care. I was all about my son and giving him my 100% attention

Tears are rolling down his face and I could literally feel his little heart and all his pain. I held my hand on his heart, it was beating so fast. I kept telling him that i love him and that I’m sorry he’s feeling this way. We sat there for a few minutes before he launched himself into my arms. He cuddled me so tight and just continued to cry. We stayed in this position for a good 5 mins. I kept reassuring him that I loved him unconditionally (that’s his favourite word at the moment and we have had many conversations around the meaning of it) that I e got him and he’s going to be ok. The tension in his body slowly softened

He was finally ready to talk to me, to tell me what was wrong. He talked and I just listened. I let him vent and didn’t need to offer any advice or solutions, he just wanted to be heard amongst all the other noise that was going on in the house.

To me it wasn’t that big of a deal but to him it seemed like the end of the world. One thing I have learnt throughout my own healing journey is just how important it is to be able to HOLD SPACE for our babies. They are little humans, they go through emotions and feelings. IT IS OUR JOB TO BE THERE for them in their time of need and NOT GET CAUGHT UP IN THEIR CHAOS

Love your babies hard. Be the light that they need in their lives ❤️ ❤️ I bloody love that I can do this for my sonny son, what an honour it is 😊